18 EPISODES
Disc One
• "New Recruits"—Bilko has a crisis of conscience when his new recruits entrust him with their money just as he's looking for a poker stake.

• "The Horse"—Wouldn't you know it? When Bilko and his men decide to bunk a horse in the guest quarters, there's a high-ranking guest on the way.

• "The WAC"—The soldiers in the newsreel had a Jeep, so Bilko wants one, too. "I joined the Army. That's where I made my mistake. I should have joined the newsreel," Bilko says. All he has to do to get that Jeep is outwit a savvy WAC.

• "The Eating Contest"—Fred Gwynne (The Munsters) guests as a champion eater who could munch Bilko's platoon to victory. Sadly, he only eats when he's sad.

• "Bivouac"—Bilko's a real pain when he tries to get sick leave to escape bivouac, especially when he gets his buddies quarantined with him.

Disc Two
• "The Twitch"—Col. Hall organizes a lecture to discourage gambling at Fort Baxter. How does Bilko rope in a crowd? By finding a way to bet on the speaker. Charlotte Rae (The Facts of Life) guests.

• "The Investigation"—"They found out about Bilko," Col. Hall says as he watches a TV panel discussing military waste. Not yet, but they soon will if Bilko's plan to show the panel how underfunded the base is fails.

• "The Revolutionary War"—The sergeant learns about "the great military tradition of the Bilkos" by reading an ancestor's diary about his service with George Washington, which comes to life as he reads.

• "The Court Martial"—What could make a monkey out of Col. Hall when he aims to sign 300 recruits? Try an actual monkey. Fortunately it's the monkey who gets court martialed here, but even a monkey deserves a better advocate than Bilko.

• "The Con Man"—It takes a geek (actually the sharklike Bilko in disguise as a too-perfect rube) to win back Doberman's $500 from card sharps.

• "A Mess Sergeant Can't Win"—Bilko's "pet pigeon," Sgt. Ritzik, is leaving the Army to open a luncheonette. Bilko decides to let Ritzik win a sure bet as a going-away gift, but the odds are against it.

• "Doberman's Sister"—"The uglier the brother, the more beautiful the sister" is the law that Bilko invokes to hook a date for slobby Doberman's sister for a base dance. Will Bilko be a sinker when he falls for his own line?

Disc Three
• "Bilko's Tax Trouble"—As Bilko tries to sell tickets for a Don Ameche's Birthday Dance, he gets an audit from the Bureau of Internal Revenue. Could they have found out about the Lady Godiva Dance he held in 1953?

• "The Big Scandal"—Bilko's spellbound by hypnotism after being put under during a presentation. Trouble is, he conjures up an entranced romantic rival for Col. Hall in Doberman. Julie Newmar guests.

• "Hillbilly Whiz"—When a new recruit (Dick Van Dyke) helps Bilko's barracks to a baseball victory, Bilko gets the man a Yankees tryout. Yogi Berra and Phil Rizzuto appear as themselves.

• "Bilko The Art Lover"—Bilko's "acting like a sergeant," so naturally his men are worried. The doctor calls for a restful break, so Bilko visits a wealthy friend in New York—just as the young man, an artist, has a falling out with his father. Alan Alda portrayed the artist as a young man.

• "Bilko Joins the Navy"—On a trip to San Diego, Bilko rolls snake eyes with the ladies, but sees a chance to float into a Navy-only craps game. Since they're disguised as sailors, you know Bilko and his men will find themselves at sea. Larry Storch guests as a sailor who sank a fortune into the game.

• "Weekend Colonel"—"Today is Bilko's debut on television; tonight his rating goes down to corporal," Col. Hall says after catching Bilko in a crap game on closed-circuit television. It's actually the show's finale; Seinfeld riffed on this one for his finale a generation or two later.

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